Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i think i have herpe
just one?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
