Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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