It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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