Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
