they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
