not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
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