trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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