I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You can't just leave with hair like that
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
