a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize