I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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