Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Randomize
