sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
This is the high leading the old right now
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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