I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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