No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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