Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
