Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
