I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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