You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
