wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Verdict: uncircumcised.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize