And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
