May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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