Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
she looked like the before picture.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize