Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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