What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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