Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
