Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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