its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Randomize
