i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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