he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
