Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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