i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
