remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
