I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
