guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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