I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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