If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Randomize