I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
last night I used snow as a chaser
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
