I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize