I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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