one word: firstdatebathroomanal
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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