just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
