can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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