HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
