Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
