You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
