Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Randomize
