Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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