oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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