Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Randomize
