He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize