She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
vagina is talking i cant
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
