where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
