Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
